Happy New Year!
All around the world people will be choosing this week to make New Year’s resolutions. The closing of an old year, and the ringing in of a new year is cause to celebrate. What resolutions will you make? We are curious about the vows Southern Floridians will make this year. Miami is a fun, crazy city. You see some one-of-a-kind characters on foot, bike, or traveling in a car. With such a lively culture, there are sure to be quite a few humorous entries when Miami residents make their New Year vows. The traditional vows to lose weight, swear less, and be more happy will pepper people’s papers, but we like to think there are a few other pressing matters on South Floridians minds. Nowhere else would people make New Year’s resolutions like the ones people in Miami, Florida would make.
So, without further ado, we present our list of Five New Year’s Resolutions South Floridians Should Make. Whether you live in the area or not, these are sure to ring true.
1. In 2015, many South Floridians will vow to refrain from wearing a bathing suit while riding a bicycle at a busy intersection. This is especially true of 80 year olds. Also, it will become illegal for anybody at all to wear a Speedo while bicycling.
2. South Floridians will pledge to collectively redo the entire Miami highway system. Anyone living in Miami understands where this sentiment is coming from. The current roads have passed frustrating and entered into the realm of downright aggravation. They are archaic, and they need to be redone. Sooner than later is preferable.
3. Miami residents who do not already speak a second language will take the time to learn one in the coming new year. After all, Spanglish is considered by many to be the native tongue in South Florida.
4. South Floridians as a whole will make a firm resolution to be on time. Most people in the region are at least two hours late. To everything. Don’t let this influence you. Set an example and don’t be late.
5. Buy new flip flops. They are largely considered to be the national shoe of Miami, which is fine when they’re actually functional. If you do not have a pair in every color known to man, you are behind the times.
If you live in Miami, or Southern Florida, celebrate the New Year by making some resolutions to improve yourself and your quality of life in 2015. No matter what has happened in the past, the New Year is a chance to make a fresh start.